First off, let me start this post by saying: HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I hope everyone had an amazing holiday season.
Always take time to celebrate YOU.
Every year comes with new challenges and obstacles.
It can be hard to look back at the year with a positive attitude if you feel like you're still not exactly where you want to be.
Maybe you wanted to pay off your debt, lose a few pounds, or talk to your family more. Whatever your goal was for 2017, let it all go.
It's okay if you didn't achieve everything you wanted.
Sometimes, we need to be reminded that the expectations we have for ourselves are just guidelines for the person we're trying to become. It doesn't mean every single thing needs to be accomplished by the end of the year or you should feel bad about yourself. One year feels like a long time... but it's really not.
Let's talk about why new years resolutions are garbage and how we can make this year, and the years to come, awesome!
Make life goals instead of yearly goals.
The only reason we make new years resolutions is to look at all of the things we want to accomplish. But, who says we can't have general life goals? Why set it to just one year? Every goal you set improves you as a human for life. So, why do we give ourselves such a small window to achieve a goal? I understand making sure you actually get it done... but if it's something you truly want to change about yourself, you're not going to be that person in one year and never have to work at it again. Work at it over the course of the year and take it with you throughout the ones to come. BOOM! Life goal.
Give yourself more credit.
You may be looking at your life in the big picture and saying "why am I not where I want to be?" or "why is this person here and I'm not?"
STOP! You can achieve anything you set your mind to. (I know you've heard it a million times, but it's true) Stop comparing yourself to others! You grow at your own pace and find your own paths. No one journey will be the same as the next. Focus on what you HAVE accomplished thus far. What did 8 year old you want you to have done by now? Do they know about all the steps you took to get to where you are? Thank yourself. Always look at what you HAVE done and what you CAN do. Not what you haven't done or can't do. Did you overcome any emotional battles/struggles this year? Did you self reflect or spend time on yourself? Did you go to a class or learn a new trait? Even setting a new boundary is growth. Those may not be on YOUR resolution list, but they're accomplishments nonetheless! You will achieve more by positive reinforcement rather than negative punishment.
You won't achieve your goals if you focus on the ones you haven't achieved. You can only move forward.
Instead, set a plan for how you're going to make your new goals happen. How can you continue to remind yourself daily of these goals? Can you have someone hold you accountable for them? Who says you can't roll your goals from 2017 into 2018? Try again! Continue and grow. No one is perfect and everyone has struggles. Make a feasible schedule that you can actually reach. Don't set false expectations for yourself that you know you won't achieve.
Instead of saying "I want to workout more in 2018" say "I'm going to start going to the gym for 1 hour 2 times a week." That way, you have a plan set in your mind. You already calculated an achievable gym schedule for yourself. Once you achieve that goal, set a higher one. Start going every other day for 2 hours. Whatever is feasible for you.
Life is all about planning. How can you get to where you want to be? The expectations we have for ourselves are just guidelines for the person we're trying to become. It means we know we can do better than what we're currently doing. That's good! You can better yourself in little ways all the time. Learn a new language, a new skill, or just something you've been wanting to know. Talk to a friend you haven't talked to in a while, clean the weird corners in your house or the overly packed scary closet you never open... (we all have one)
In 2017 I learned how to make healthy homemade meals for myself, started learning French, started working out religiously, learned a lot about myself and how I handle stress, and so much more!
In 2018 I want to... learn more French, continue my workout routine/more challenging workouts, continue to cook more meals, write more blog posts, travel somewhere outside of my country, take more time to focus on myself and what I need, and get better at expressing my emotions with others.
List your accomplishments to see how much you've achieved! I bet it's more than you think. Write down a plan for the year/years to come.
Always take a step back to look at the little things you've done to better yourself. You may not be exactly where you want to be, but that just means there's room to grow! I'm rooting for you!